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Healing Rhythms

Anonymous In Austin, TX

I have worked in a business office with two older women. One of these is a bully who seems to hate me for whatever reason. She is constantly saying unkind things about me, running me down to other people. She has turned a lot of people against me.




Comments for
Anonymous In Austin, TX

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Creating zero tolerance
by: Linda Guirey

Hi there
I feel for you. It is very hard to continue working in that hostile environment. Do you have anybody around you who is supportive of you. Do you have any witnesses to what this woman is doing?

You could confront the woman directly (if she is not a manager), and just ask her if you have done anything to upset her and how can you both work together better. Try and ensure you have a witness to that conversation, a colleague who can support you and vouch for the fact that you are doing everything you can to improve communication.

When that backfires, you could approach management. Do you have a 'code of conduct' or 'workplace bullying / harassment' policy. Can you use part of that.

It is just not acceptable to be abusive in the workplace and you should not have to tolerate it. Your health is the most important, so if you feel you have no alternatives, then you need to look to a brighter future elsewhere. Don't give this woman the power to affect your health.

There is support out there for you.

Linda Guirey
The 'Marbles' Expert
www.lindaguirey.co.nz
Bullied in Austin
by: Anonymous

I've tried talking to the women per what my HR rep suggested. I keep being told it is my work quality that is off, but I do all I can to improve and the criticism continues. They had a birthday party and gave me a card with a humiliating message in it. I just try to ignore it, but I've become a different person in this job. It has affected my health and self worth. I suspect they are trying to make me have a nervous breakdown. Their criticism of me is always nasty and personal. I suspect they have bullied others in the past. There is no real remedy. I'm just trying to find another job.
Similar situation, all the best to you
by: Anonymous

I am in a similar situation myself.
Humiliating messages, rude/hateful comments, etc.

Just know that you are worth 10 times the people who blindly follow such tripe and that you can do better than this, and your work and integrity will always speak for themselves. Stay with a head up!!
Bullied in Austin
by: Anonymous

Hi,

Still here being bullied. One of my duties is to shred documents. I recently found a draft of a strategic plan--in it my job is to be eliminated. I have no idea when or if this will happen. I believe the bullies left it in the shred box so that I would find it...

Add fear about my job to the bullying and it is pretty much a horrible atmosphere. I've been looking for other jobs to transfer, but I'm concerned the HR (in league with bullies) will paper my personnel file.
Still bullied
by: Linda Guirey

I am so sorry to hear that you are still at the job and continue to be bullied. You mentioned that you found a document that was destined for the shredder and in it was something about your job being eliminated. I don't know what the employment law is in the USA, but here in NZ, that amounts to constructive dismissal - ie your employer is set on removing you without your knowledge.

I don't know if you are up to seeking advice legally, but I do implore you to either fight or move on because you will start to get unwell, stressed and even suffer Post Traumatic Stress Disorder PTSD, if you continue there. It is a toxic environment for you.

Often fighting is not the best solution because you need good evidence and witnesses and a lot of determination and resilience. Clearly targets of bullying are often missing those because they have been put down and humiliated for so long.

Take control of your health and really search for another job - anything that can take you out of there. Then you can use that time to look for something more ideal.

Linda


Linda Guirey
The 'Marbles Expert'
www.lindaguirey.co.nz
in Austin
by: Anonymous

Hi,

I'm still working at the university and have been laid off. I believe I was eliminated due to my complaints about bullying. I've been called stupid crazy you name it. I've been trying to find another job, but due to the bully's stature I'm afraid I will not be hired. Gossip runs this place. I'm kind of stuck in this town as my husband works here. I'm at a loss at what to do.

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