What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Broken After Five Years Of Abuse

by Dominic
(St. Augustine FL, USA)

I worked ten years at a job and the last five were filled with verbal, mental, and a few times even physical abuse. This is my story. When I started my job I told my boss that I had a head injury when I was younger and ultimately my brain also was injured and it left me kind of emotional and that I do not like to joke around, name call or any of the things that close quarter people may act like.

That was a series mistake on my part. About 3 years into my job I was hit on my way to work at a red light and it completely destroyed my spine, I went to the hospital and the doc wrote me a note to be on light duty and I needed a month off, no question, but how do you do that when you're the only employee? So for the next year I had appointments and my boss was semi OK with it but it got to the point were I wasn't healing and after about six hours I would be completely in pain like fire and if I said anything he would work me till dark just to prove he was strong and I was weak.

There wasn't any real abuse yet but after the city yr I met a woman who came to work with us. She was 15 years my senior and we hit it off good but as the a little time wore on I find out she was friends with his wife from school which I thought that nothing could go wrong but I was way off. It ended that my boss had a secret crush on her for years and he would get mad over nothing then proceed to explain to me everybody she had slept with in the past.

He would be mean and nasty about it many times at work purposely making me cry many, many times he would make have to leave the docks in tears to go cry in the bathroom, constantly pointing out her flaws telling me that she was trash and I was too for being with her. Hardly trash she was a retired homicide detective.

His insistent negativity destroyed a relationship. You might ask, "why did I stay working?" Well, I felt weak; I was injured and mentally broken; I felt stuck. So after the destruction I ended up on my own.

During this time period I didn't have much left so if I got new shoes or clothes or sunglasses. He would, out in front of people say, how far did you have to chase that faggot to get those shoes; what queer did you beat up to get that shirt and so on—daily.

One day we had a job that he was doing as a favor and moving boat batteries is what it involved with two people I still could hardly lift one much less backwards up a teak staircase. I pleaded with him that I wouldn't be able to do it. I got a whole bunch of crap for it and then he hit me with the loyalty scam. I felt cornered, no way out. Four batteries into it I crushed my spine, got a hernia and tore my minuscus. He would not take me to the hospital and threatened me not to claim Workman's Comp.

So my dad took me and when they asked I said he told not to claim so no claim. I couldn't hardly move much less work. Well, the nit-picking started, threatening me with taking money for trivial stuff or making me work for less at his house if I broke or lost some wax or supplies, very trivial stuff, and if I looked or said anything about being in pain he would say to the customer "he has female in him, he's a female," daily.

One day came were he was picking and threatening money off of my check I yelled stop and when I looked forward again he karate chopped me in the throat and in an instant I fired back to get him off and jumped out of a moving truck. Then, to my horror, before I could call help he had called his best bud who is a commander on a police force, someone there to protect me actually didn't.

He was put on speaker phone and said, "you better go back to work with him or I will send a deputy to take you to jail." I was crushed. I just wanted to run out in front of a car and end it but fortune shined on me and I didn't. He took all work away from me and fired me. So I started my own business.

He bullied me by stopping in the road or where he could to yell, cuss and belittle me till I was too paranoid to go outside much less run a business were I would see my bully on a daily basis still.

I've been broken over this but just maybe I can be one of the healed I hope.

Thank you for your time.


Comments for Broken After Five Years Of Abuse

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by: anonymous NJ

Dear Broken; I too share your problem; the problem is your story is a bit too detailed and the important facts get lost and then you lose people.

I don't doubt you had work difficulties; But; let me put your story into 3 short paragraphs that highlight what matters:

> This is my story: I worked ten years at a job and the last five were filled with verbal, mental, and a few times even physical abuse.

[now speak specifically with short examples]

I had been employed 3 years when I had an accident while on the way to work; another car hit the back of my car and this subsequently did great damage to my spine. Rather than leave the job under disability; or take lighter duty because I was the only employee; I decided to try outpatient treatment and keep working. The pain was unbearable but my complaints fell on deaf ears as my boss insisted at those times I work overtime.

[this would cite example of physical abuse but definitive number of times per weak in a six month period would add credibility]

I got involved with a new female employee; who I later found was the friend of boss's wife. The boss made constant derogatory comments about her and my relationship with this woman. (not necessary to go into details about this woman's character) This would be the example of mental or emotional abuse. And all you needed to cite was how often and where or 'date, place, time'

Then there were instances of verbal degradation where he mocked the fashions I chose, insisted loudly I perform work that was beyond my physical ability at the time, and when I did injure myself in performance of these duties; I was told by boss not to file any workman's compensation claim. (there's your verbal abuse claims)


So; let me share: "I find simply by the manner in which you tell your story; it is difficult to believe" I don't say perhaps there might be some grains of truth; but …sorry; I just find it hard to believe someone with back pain like on fire; would work LONG into the night because 'boss' said so. (I know people with back pains and they would collapse) Your story loses some validity when you start out saying you had a previous brain injury that left you "emotional", and the fact that you had a relationship with a female co worker (while stating an accident completely destroyed your spine? but you can have a relationship? Then with a completely destroyed spine… you start your own business. (though you said initially you suffered mental verbal and physical abuse half of the time on a ten year job…TEN years there and you claim your boss is 'that bad?' No…it doesn't hold water.

Sorry… for your many troubles; but glad you are now very much self employed in your own business. IF you needed this forum to vent… it was good of Anton to allow you; now go forward a happy man.

I'll say a prayer for your continued good and happy life.

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