What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Bullied at a Large Super Market and My Health Has Suffered


(Bedfordshire, England)

Depression, anixety, weight loss, insomnia, is just some of how I'm feeling after being bullied. It started over a year ago, I got a job in a large store which I was really enjoying.

I had always been a confident person, on the outside anyway. On the inside I struggle with self esteem and worry. Im a single parent and have been for many years. I struggle with my kids as there 18 and 16 and walk all over me. Im told im a door mat in everyones eyes, but there right. Ive always been a happy bubberly person tho, but have always had trouble making friends with women as they just seem to take an instant dislike to me.

Like in alot of stores you get (the group) popular with everyone.

I never wanted to get into that crowd, and did speak to them at the start. Within a few months I was being laughed at, sniggers, evil looks etc. I kept my head down and didnt say anything.

Christmas eve was the worst ever...

The sniggers and that had stopped about a week before xmas, and some of the group was starting to talk to me. Kept asking me to go to the pub with them for a drink xmas eve. Like a fool I really thought they wanted to be friends and was genuine.

Going for that drink was the worst thing I could do and its ruined my life.

I turned up at the pub xmas eve there was all the (group) there Including a manager that has a reputation of sleeping with all the (group) and not forgetting all there friends, so there was alot there that night.

Within minutes I relised I'd made a big mistake going not one person spoke to me even tho I tried. The looks had started and the sniggering, whispering but I dint have the bulls just to get up and walk out, I couldnt do it cause I didnt want to look stupid.

I rang my daughter to come up with her boyfriend to the pub to give me support, which they did.

I had been in the pub about 2 hours with no one talking to me and the sniggers, in the end I told my daughter and boyfriend we was going.

They walked out the pub and as I was just about to walk thro the doors when the group had come after me.

That night I suffered humiliation, shouting and laughing close to my face then I was beaten up. My daughter and her boyfriend being held while watching me get beaten. I will never forget that night and neither will my daughter.

Xmas day was ruined my daughter in tears and me black and blue sobbing. I didnt go to the police, I was to scared I had to work with these people and just wanted it all to be over.

I wasnt due back to work until January, I thought things would calm down by the time I went back.

It hadnt tho and when I went to work everyone new wot had happened and was laughing at me. In the canteen at break times I'd be sitting on my own while the rest was in groups looking over at me and at me talking and laughing. Even some of the managers was joining in.

I didnt do anything at first but then went and spoke to a senior manager and told him everything.

It made it worse for me... I have now been off work since end of January, suffered a nervious break down, big weight loss, I'm on sleeping pills and antidepressants. Ive had couselling, which helped me.

I have had no support from my work with this either and my kids have really suffered to.

Im hoping I can find another job so I can get out, but as things are its very hard at min. I cant go back to the store to work I'm to scared now, even tho I'm on the mend my life has changed for the worse and I dont speak to anyone now unless its my kids or family and im scared to leave the house.

Later today I will have to tho as I've been called for a formal meeting with my bosses, and I'm terrified. If any bullies are reading any of these letters, just see how much you destroy lives with wot you do...

Comments for Bullied at a Large Super Market and My Health Has Suffered

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stay away from former co-workers
by: Anonymous

I read your story on your former super market job. I am sorry that you suffered a nervous breakdown over this horrible experience, but thanks to God you have gotten out of there. I think that you should stay away from anyone and everyone from your former job, these people are truly evil and need help. God sees everything and those people will be dealt with in time.

You should just always consider your health first and your well being. No job is worth losing your sanity. Jobs come and go and you will find another job where the people will treat you with dignity and respect. Good Luck!!

bullied in a large super market and my health has suffered
by: Anonymous

Im so sorry to hear that you are getting bullied in a super market, i know it happens to the public too as i saw a few customers having to deal with the same when i was working in the super market that i suffered bullying and assult in. if you spoke to a manager like many of the customers i saw did, they dont do anything and just laugh along with the people you've complained about. Ive seen and heard it so many times before. If you feel you are strong enough to complain, try and contact the head office and they will get someone from the head office to go in and investigate. Try and stay strong and dont let them affect you llike ive been affected, im so glad that you have a partner to support you.

I have managed to find another job now, but the bullying is still affecting me, my self esteam and confidence is none existant and feel paranoid that my new work colleges are talking and laughing about me. I dont mix with anyone and luckly i only live a short distance to where i work now and i go home for my lunch hour to get away. Im struggling to learn the job that im being trained up in as i dont have the confidence anymore, im making lots of silly mistakes and know my boss is feeling a bit fed up with me but i know its all the result of the bullying as before it happened to me i had the fight in me to learn new things and pick them up quickly.

I dont go out or be social with anyone, my phone never rings and i dont get texts, when i finish work i come straight home and lock the door. I havent been to the super market i worked and was bullied in since it all happened, and now shop in a super market thats more expensive, but even then i wont go alone my daughter has to come with me. I dont take pride in myself any more, i dont do my hair or make up and dont care what i wear any more, im still on my sleeping pills and antidepressants they help alittle but they dont take away the aniexty or give you back your self eastem or self worth. The bullying has certainly changed my life, i have nothing anymore.

All my love and prayers xx

Supermarket Bullies...
by: Sue

I was horrified to read your story. I have had something similar done to me, but so far I have not experienced physical violence.

I know it was impossible for you to go to the police about the beating, but those people are guilty of a serious offence, not just bullying. They committed a serious assault and should never have been allowed to get away with it.

I have been a victim of supermarket bullying, even though I do not work there, and have until recently been a very regular customer of theirs.

I don't go there as much now, but now I am getting the 'evil looks' in the street, by a few individuals who are neighbours. I don't know whether it's connected or not.
It seems that the main bully (who is employed there) is using the supermarket as their main focal point to bully and harass members of the community, or at least me anyway.

I know you were afraid and that you have to work with these animals, but oh, how I wish you could have informed the police while you still had the bruises. They got away with a criminal act. They should have been made to pay for it.

I wish you all the best and hope you can someday find healing and a better place of work.

I am sending my prayers and positive thoughts your way.

All the best, Sue.

Bullied at a large supermarket and my health has suffered
by: Anonymous

I wanted to say thank you to everyone for your support.
I have felt so alone, but you have all made me see that im not alone and it is happening to many people.
I have spoken to my daughter about going to the police, but like me she is so scared that they will come after her and just wants to try and move on from everything thats happened.
My son is pleading with me to get better and tells me to forget what happened and be strong so i can stand up for myself.
I understand what my children are saying, as they are terrified for me as im all they have.
I had my meeting with the bosses the other day and ended up in tears, there not interested in what happened just there sales figures and been told my contract is now terminated.
Thank you for recommending the book (how to solve your problems) i have found that i am reading alot of books lately on self help, and i have now ordered that book to read.
Thank you again to everyone, and i shall pray for us all xx

supermarket bullies
by: Anonymous

My God you poor woman. No one should have to put up with that. I would go to the police and find yourself a good solicitor. What happened outside the pub at Christmas was assault, all those involved should have found themselves in court. Please do this for your children, if you cannot do it for yourself, otherwise they will think it is ok to be on the receiving end of this behaviour. I know its hard but sometimes we have to stand up and be counted. It is one thing to be laughed at and excluded in your place of work but it is quite another to be physically assaulted at a social event. Keep seeing your counsellor and if you cannot afford a solicitor, apply for legal aid. Remember your daughter and her boyfriend are witnesses to this appalling behaviour. I will say a prayer that you will get the strength to defend yourself. God Bless -- Cathy

Bullied Out Of 2 Sales Jobs
by: Anonymous

I know how you feel, no you were not and are not being overly sensitive, for some reason, obviously these people were I believe jealous of you, I don't know if your sales were good, but that's what happened to me.

I haven't been able to get a good job in the area since all of this happened to me, I even tried changing to a secretarial, I had to put them down as a reference because I was there for about 2 years, and I know that they gave me a bad reference, even though I did Not do a thing wrong, they had trashed me to everyone.

A funny thing happened though I ran into one of my old co workers and she said I should come back and reapply, I told her that although I had forgiven everyone, that I couldn't put myself thru all of that again. Luckily, I have a husband that is working. If I were you, if you
haven't or hadn't been there that long, DO NOT put them down as a reference or on your resume' because they will continue to do this. Maybe you could have a friend as a reference also. Employment agencies are also good to start that way you can get into some businesses, and then they will hire you (contract to hire) Manpower,
is good.

Be praying for you.

So Sad for You
by: Solange

People are cruel because they are insecure. They think it makes them feel special and strong to be part of a group that overpowers someone else. Unfortunately for them, it just makes them more miserable because they have to keep ramping up what they do to get the same charge.
People are cruel because they are insecure. They think it makes them feel special and strong to be part of a group that overpowers someone else. Unfortunately for them, it just makes them more miserable because they have to keep ramping up what they do to get the same charge.

Look what they did to you. The more they could get away with, the more they did. Finally, they physically assaulted you. Everyone loses in a situation like this.

I know right now you are feeling very bad. When you feel well enough, see if you can make a picture in your mind of the worst offender....in their underwear... then you laugh... then you see them as a little child being naughty... and you laugh. Then you see them as a little child... who needs your love... and you send them imaginary love. At the deepest level, that is all anyone is ever looking for. But when you are in so much pain, it can be hard to see.

Please take care of yourself.
Look what they did to you. The more they could get away with, the more they did. Finally, they physically assaulted you. Everyone loses in a situation like this.

I know right now you are feeling very bad. When you feel well enough, see if you can make a picture in your mind of the worst offender....in their underwear... then you laugh...then you see them as a little child being naughty....and you laugh. Then you see them as a little child...who needs your love...and you send them imaginary love. At the deepest level, that is all anyone is ever looking for. But when you are in so much pain, it can be hard to see.

Please take care of yourself.

Supermarket Bullying
by: Anonymous

I cannot imagine such horribleness and meanness, but I KNOW it exists today. I've had my share but not the physical beating up. I do not know what our world has become when people are reduced to such inhumanity and think it is "normal." I just found a book, in the local supermarket no less, that I am finding has some very useful, common sense information for "Dealing with your difficult relationships." The title: How to Solve Your People Problems by Alan Godwin, published by Harvest House Publishers, Eugene OR. He rarely uses the word "bully," but rather, "unreasonable people" but it is one and the same thing. Basically, he is saying unreasonable people have not grown up... some will, some might and some never will. It gives sound advice on how to deal with the three types of unreasonable people. It is not a quick fix, and takes time, but it does appear to hold hope for us who are targets.
I hope the very best for you.

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