What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Head Bitch of HR

by Maria
(Miami, FL)

I've been working for this company for four months and from the moment I walked in, I've felt hostility towards me. No matter how hard I tried to get through to the women I work with, nothing worked. I was polite and thoughtful. I offered to help. I said good morning/afternoon even after being constantly ignored. It has gotten to the point where even the way I dress is an issue, even though the other women wear inappropriate clothing, I am the only one who is called out on it.

I don't know what to do anymore. It is getting really serious and I feel like quitting. The job itself is great and the pay is excellent but I am getting tired of being picked on for no other reason than being me. I don't try to stand out or make waves yet they still find ways to harass me or blame me for things I don't do.


How To Deal With Workplace Bullying: What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Comments for Head Bitch of HR

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HR
by: Anonymous

to 'feel like quitting' because of hostility.

The hostility is not to you. You mention other women calling you out; but is it the supervisor? the exec? owner of company? Don't give the devil his due. Don't worry what 'they say' about you. If the bosses are happy with your work; just do it and spend as little time chit chatting. When they complain of your manner of dress (they just want something to complain of because that's their nature; to complain) When they complain; turn the tables and give them a compliment. Say what they do not expect. (what they expect from you is what they would say) Be different.

Oh? This way of dress is not good? Thank you, I really appreciate it; only a true friend helps us to be better. oh oh...they didn't mean to come off sounding like a friend. Ask them specifically what would be appropriate and see if they respond (and be and sound sincere; not sarcastic) They might come back with an 'out' "we-eeeeell if at your age you don't know what is appropriate, I'm not going to tell you."
(cop out) Thank them again, you are so right; how stupid of me. (sure; tell them what they want to hear; it makes them feel good and life is short anyway; we should make folks feel good.)

Be observant of the styles of others, and buy the exact same / better yet; look how the female boss dresses or male if male, and dress in the exact same manner. Now, if they are criticizing your choice of clothing; they are criticizing
the boss's style. Reverse Psychology. Play along with the petty nonsense.

If polite isn't working and helpful isn't working; pull back. Don't speak unless spoken to. They can't hang you if you don't give them info. When everything said 'is wrong' / get the message / they are insecure about your knowledge and manners. So... in other centered way, pull back and watch and listen only; while on off hours getting any type of other job. (retail sales, avon sales lady, newspaper delivery route, or waitress) Any other job and then quietly give notice. No fuss No Muss. (right, you gave them what they wanted but don't let that bother you, you don't care what they think; you are still employed and earning money)

Commenting on fashion sense is high school! We have an adolescent workforce (even the college educated) They never grew in spirit. They are children who want attention at all costs.

scapegoating
by: Anonymous

Hi, I read something recently that really hit the spot as far as most of the bullying dynamics I've experienced go - if they're using you as a Scapegoat - it sounds to me like they are - your treatment will be ARBITRARY. That is, the rules that you're subjected to will be inconsistent with the rules they're subjected to, they will be arbitrary. Perhaps you've triggered their inferiority complex and they're trying to "get rid of you" because you're too competent/intelligent/well mannered and they find it painful to be around, as they're threatened by you.

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