What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Its Not Right And There's No Way Out

by Sharon
(Herts, UK)

I've been working for a large company for two years and often get letters of commendation from the clients I work for. I have never had a day off sick and always do alot more than the 40 hrs a week I get paid for, without extra pay. I don't mind that so much as I want to help the 45 staff I have working under me and value their commitment and hard work. I treat my staff extremely well and often buy them treats to show them my appreciation out of my own pocket.

I started work doing 25 hrs a week and they offered me an extra 15 hrs a week 1 month after I started. My manager I had at the time was bullying the staff I now have under me and I put in a complaint, She was investigated and dismissed 1 month later.

I really thought I had a good job where they actually listened to the little people like myself.

The extra hours I took on meant I would be working under another manager for those 15 hrs a week in a different department. I really thought he was an ok guy, I couldn't of been so wrong.

At first he seemed to appreciate me and let me get on with it but I noticed the units he had were not up to scratch and needed alot of work, so I put in extra hours to bring them up to standard, he seemed to change overnight.

He visits them and has meetings without me and complains to our line manager about me, She doesn't bother to ask me about the problems she just takes his word for it and is very off with me, I feel like I am walking on eggshells around her now and can't seem to do a thing right, he tries at every opportunity to put me down and always speaks loud so everyone can hear him to have a go at me, when we are on our own he is as nice as pie.

He wrote a letter to one of my girls working under me to invite her to an investigation meeting a couple of days ago and told me that I had to do notes for him on this day, I said I was unavailable as I was on a course that day. He went to my line manager and whispered in her ear something I could not hear, she shouted to me wanting to know where I was that was more important that I couldn't do notes for this meeting, I replied I'm on the course you told me I had to attend, she didn't apologise and he just smirked at me, I know I should of spoke up and said that I had already told him why I could not attend the investigation but that would of just made my line manager more anti me.

I received another letter of recognition last week and put it in my line managers in tray. I watched her read it and just throw it back in her tray. Not a word was said to me.

I am at the end of my tether there is alot more that has happened but I can't see through the tears in my eyes to write anymore. I love my job.

Comments for Its Not Right And There's No Way Out

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Its Not Right
by: Linda Guirey

I really feel for your situation. Clearly you are feeling trapped but still love your job.

Is there another line manager with whom you have a good relationship or can you gather evidence and witnesses and approach a more senior manager? You would need to come from the perspective of wanting to ensure that everyone understood each other better and with a positive and harmonious environment, there will be better outcomes. The one thing that has the most direct impact on productivity is morale. The one thing that has the most direct impact on morale is leadership - the mood and competence or incompetence of leadership within the organisation.

The problem when most targets of bullying speak up, is that they are often seen as the trouble maker since the bully always makes themselves look good. If you could get other people to support your statements and/or evidence that you are being treated unfairly and not being supported, that might be helpful.

Or, can you look for another opportunity in that workplace that doesn't leave you working for the same boss. Whatever you decide to do, you have to ensure that your health doesn't get affected by the stress and anxiety you are feeling. Clearly you are good at your job - remember that, and don't give other people control over your own self esteem or health.

Perhaps you could get some of your team to support you in whatever action you take. Some ideas to consider. I wish you well.

Linda Guirey
www.lindaguirey.co.nz

cry for help
by: paula

hi linda

sorry to here your news.its so not fair that we are just doing are daily jobs and theres no one to help us when we need it.i do hope it gets a little better for you.

paula

Hope things get better
by: Bob

Hi Sharon

Sorry to hear about this. I have experienced bullying too and until you actually do you never realise how serious it is.

It's a hundred times worse than I ever imagined and I can see from your post that you feel you need to move on to another job.

Remember a job is a job - Obviously you need a job to pay bills but health should be first.

I feel for you and wish you all the best. I wish the people who bully others would see what their actions actually do.

I know when you raise the issue with HR they make you feel like you are at fault or you are a trouble maker as that's what I've seen from my experience.

I hope your situation improves or that you find a way to either leave or move to another job.

Good luck.

Bob

its not right part 2
by: sharon

Thank you all for all your kind comments.
Im sorry to say that nothing has changed and even though i have just got yet another Email from someone very high up in the NHS, im still being treated unfairly and often get the silent treatment.
The good news is i have just passed my NVQ level 3 and can start looking for a decent company to work for.
I heard something that made me smile for the first time in a long time the other day and i would like to share it with you all.
If you had 3 balls and named them WORK,FAMILY and FRIENDS and you threw them all in the air, you can only catch 2 of them so you have to let one drop, which one would you let drop..... well you can guess which one i chose and i hope you all also let the ball named WORK also fall to the floor... it is without doubt the least important ball you will ever hold....
Kind Regards to all that read this.
Sharon

NHS Bullying
by: JessicaLouise

How did I guess it was the NHS! It's absolutely endemic, and I experienced the exact same situation with my last job there. Someone slightly higher up than me, who shared same line manager, badmouthing me to our boss, until boss became standoffish with me in the same way you describe, when she had previously been fine with me. Perhaps open up a dialogue with your boss and ask her why her attitude has changed towards you. I don't believe you are imagining this, and she may tell you what he has said. You sound more confident and experienced than I was - this was part of the reason I was vulnerable to being bullied, and why I didn't speak up the way I am advising you to. The other possibility is that they are having an affair, but although that happens, that is unlikely. I think it is simpl how bullying in the NHS manifests itself, because this is exactly what happened to me. CONT

NHS Bullying CONT
by: JessicaLouise

When you improved his units, you showed him up and his claws came out. Never mind him and his bad attitude - the relationship you need to focus on is the one that his bad attitude has attempted to destroy; the one with your boss. Stand up to him, don't let him backstab you. It's already working and soon you will find responsibilities removed, and your boss phasing you out. This is what happened to me. Assert yourself, do the unexpected. Speak to your boss, and reclaim your relationship, and your good name. If she can be turned so easily by a conversation with him, she can be turned just as easily by a coversation with you, and the difference is that you are telling the truth. She sounds as weak as my former boss actually - you essentially will have to manage her!
If things still don't improve by you doing this, seek out another post. You deserve more - put up a good fight, but make sure you know when it is time to retreat for your own health and happiness.

at last
by: sharon

Just wanted to say i have found myself a new job and will be leaving shortly, cant wait and im sooooooo happy.

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