What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Mobbed in Indiana

by Jennifer
(Indiana)

I have two co-workers who are like night and day. The are both older than I am. I really like working with them but the emotional strain is becoming difficult. On one hand they go out of their way to be nice to me. The threw me a wonderful birthday party weeks after my original birthday. (It was late because I was trying to conceal it and I thought once I got past the date, I would be fine.) They put together a fabulous survival kit for a trip my family took to see my mother in law and other various family members in my husbands family.

They sound great don't they. Like any office co-workers anyone would love to have. However, their is a very dark and evil side. The same people who were responsible for the above are also responsible for stealing TO DO lists from my desk. They mock my organized ways. I am ridiculed almost daily.

These two have also stolen stickers that we use at my work. They even got into my desk and took my secret stash that I had pre-torn for myself to use. Now I am such a nice person that I tore my coworkers a stack too, so that they may benefit from my organized ways. Nevertheless, I was able to overcome this thievery by utilizing my secret, secret stash of stickers. They continue to mock me and leave ransom notes in my mailbox. The ransom notes state that I am not able to speak to my bosses about this.

These kind of mind games have taken a toll on me. The emotional rollercoaster is too much to bear. They scare me and I am afraid what may come next if they are not stopped. This weekend, I have purchased candy for them as a peace offering. I have been told that often the abusee in a relationship will buy gifts as a way to smooth things over even when they are not at fault.

Please offer any tips or suggestions. It would be greatly appreciative. (If I had their pictures, I would post it with this so that others may stay away from them and escape the emotional turmoil of trying to be their friends and work along side them.

Comments for Mobbed in Indiana

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Sales Job
by: Anonymous

I have posted online also about bullying in the workplace. The best thing you can do is find another job, or just put in your 2 week notice, I don't know what your money situation is but I would definitely look for another position, and don't tell them where you're going, because they will just go to your new workplace and harass. That's what happened to me, and then I went to another workplace, and the same thing happened.

So, my husband is now working and providing for us. Because everytime I go to work at another job, my ex boss sends some or one of her so called friends to my work environment, and they just stare at me. I have decided to change from selling to go into another type of work environment, because of all of this, it has been a nightmare.

But I would definitely change jobs, and don't tell them where you're going, because if you do, it will be a never ending cycle.

I will pray for you.

Double-Edge Sword
by: Anonymous

How I identify with your situation. I work with a volunteer who is also a double-edge sword. He is a homeless man I've known twenty years. Lately his bullying is becoming far worse. He has schizophrenia that I used to blame for his behaviors until I finally learned that many people with schizophrenia do not act like that. He enters my private space when I am gone (he knows he is not to do that), steals change, sugar, salt, good meat from the deep freeze. He seems to enjoy doing volunteer work but lately when I bring him here from a large city, he refuses to do almost nothing, reads all day and starts to bully me, explaining how I am abusing him, I am a bully, etc.

Some days he gets so bad I take him right back to the city, 100 mile trip, using expensive gas because I can't endure the pain and lack of help. A few days later he calls to apologize and I believe him. Sadly, we have no other volunteer in this small town and he knows it and taunts me with that knowledge. I don't know what to do either to solve the problem..if we had even one more volunteer who could work like he does, we'd never use him again. I can only empathize with how you are treated. When I ask him to please stop (addressing your co-workers may result in the same behavior) he has retaliated by being even more cruel and stealing more things. (We are not able to lock and keep him out of the spaces as he finds a way in.)

Lighten Up a Bit
by: SH

Sounds like you may be behaving idiosyncratically with regard to your "organized ways". Your co-workers may just be doing this in a good natured way. If you can laugh at yourself a bit it may help to dispel your eccentric reputation. However, if you react strongly about the disappearance of note pads you will be setting yourself up for further shenanigans.

I don't believe this is at the stage of "mobbing" just yet and I hope these people do not have malicious intent but if you exhibit unusual or obsessive behavior it can be tempting for others to mock this especially if you try to push your organized ways on them.

I wouldn't say anything about the candies being a "peace offering". Bringing them to share with co-workers is fine but I would not continue to make an issue of small things because it will only provoke bigger things.

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