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Principal's Daughter Bullying My Daughter

by Lee
(Dallas, GA, USA)

Well, my child's bullying story began in May of 2011. Her boyfriend broke up with her the day after the prom and 12 days later began dating another girl. That's when the bullying started. Over the next several months tweets, Facebook posts, and tumblr posts came about from both the ex-boyfriend and the new girlfriend calling my daughter names, commenting on her physical appearance and calling her psycho. Several of the couples' friends got involved in the games and I eventually had to call the police on an 18-year-old who would not leave my daughter and her new boyfriend alone.

The one piece I have left out of this horrible story is the other girl is the daughter of the Principal at my daughter's school. I met with the Principal in May when this started with proof of the cyber harassment and she didn't look at my proof but assured me the bullying would stop. It continued through the summer and then came to a head Fall of 2011.

My daughter and the girl got into a yelling argument during school. My husband and I met with the principal and our two daughters and I felt as if at least something had been accomplished and for a short while things settled down. However, because both girls are involved in the drama department it began again when both were cast in a play. I am at a complete loss as to what to do as it continues to happen and the Principal only believes her daughter and of course the daughter continues to deny everything. I am so over this situation.

The girl is a senior and my daughter is a junior and it will end in May, but I don't think my daughter or my family can take much more of this stress. Any ideas? It's really hard to challenge someone on who is authority and has a decent reputation in the community. So I guess we will try to make it through May. I just feel as if this is unfair.

Comments for Principal's Daughter Bullying My Daughter

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Schools a hard battle
by: Anonymous

It is unfair. You have done a great job in trying to solve the problem. I do hope it gets better. I suppose you could go higher up if it gets out of control again. BUT I am a firm believer that 'they' will stick up for one another, so be very very careful.
I once reported some grade school children, including kindergarten kids left alone in the school yard after the 9am bell was rung. I took my concerns to the principal, I was asked if I would stay behind to make sure all the kids got into the school before the doors closed and if I noticed any wanderers to bring them into the front doors. No problem I said. A week later the principal called me in and showed me a letter from the teachers union, it was a complaint made by a teacher that a 'spy' was at the school and they wanted this 'spy' removed. Both the principal and I where upset because that was not either of our intentions. My intent was strictly for the safety and well being of the children as was the principal's, who never asked me anything about the teachers habits, etc. After that I only stayed long enough to insure that my child got into the building safely. It was very hard turning my back on the other children.
Shortly after this I was in the school during school hours, just to drop something off, as I was passing by my son's classroom,I could hear voices, laughter and noises which sounded like the whole class was participating in. As I got closer to the door a teacher stopped me to talk. As we spoke, my son's teacher came into view and we made eye contact, no big deal, but then she smirked at me, turned towards her class and in a very loud, belittling way, she started yelling at my son and only my son for being loud and misbehaving. (My son still doesn't know what he was doing wrong that day!) She then stood at the door facing me with her arms crossed, feet apart, standing very tall, looking right at me. I got the message, loud and clear! I left.
I had too. I put a 'mark' on my child's back. He still tells me that that was the worst year of school he has ever had, and it was.
I felt so weak, so threatened, and so bad for my young son who had nothing to do with any of this.
After years of taking an active role in my children's school, I completely stopped. That ended it for me.
It's one thing when a bully comes after yourself, another when they come after your children.
Small town. She teaches grade school, her husband teaches high school. What choice do I have!?

It's the parents!!!

I am sorry your daughter has to go through this. Sounds like some jealousy and insecurity going on. I blame the parents in a lot of this. The parents don't want to believe that their kids can do anything wrong. Most parents cannot be objective about their own children; many even going on the attack. We are all human and have our faults, even our children! Too many parents let their identity get wrapped up in their children's successes.
Also, parents are raising their children to be very selfish. They want their children to have everything. I have heard countless parents tell their child(ren) to do what makes them happy and not worry about anyone else. When you have a bunch of kids running around, only thinking of themselves, it makes relationships and compromise very difficult. They do not want to bend for anyone else. They are apathetic to others' feelings and needs. The world should revolve around them. This sense of entitlement, among other things, is ruining our society.
Unfortunately, life is not fair. It is filled with selfish, mean people who will do anything--lying, backstabbing, schmoozing, playing politics--to put themselves ahead. There is often little that can be done about it. You have to know when to pick your battles. Learn that there are somethings that you just cannot control, you can only control your reactions to it: fight it, let it go, let it eat you alive, etc. We had to teach our daughter to not let her bullies have control over her. We could not stop it--the school wouldn't do anything, the parents wouldn't do anything. We taught her not to react at times, and we taught her to get in their face at times. We worked on building her self-esteem. It has worked most of the time. One very jealous girl stopped the face-to-face bullying, but resorted to a campaign of lying about my family. Her parents have even gotten in on the harassment. It has done a lot of damage. It is a very difficult situation. There are no easy answers. We have thought about legal action. I wish you the best of luck!

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