What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Retail Store Manager Needs Advice

by Kim

I am a manager at a well known retail store, my issue is with another manager who is on the same level as myself. We used to be ok with each other I used to go to her kids b-day parties and we would talk on the phone here and there and suddenly everything changed.

I have been a manager with the company for longer than she has however she has been with the company 2 years longer than I have. I believe that she is intimidated because she has been with the company longer and I know more aspects of the business than she does. Recently our store manager resigned, now things were bad before she left but she tended to keep this manager in line for the most part.

Things have recently gotten out of control, we got a new store manager (who is someone that I've known and worked with for a long time) She is a bit of a pushover and doesn't really do anything with any complaints that have come about.

This manager is condescending, talks down to not only myself but a few other employees. She targets people that respect me as a manager and tries to pit us against each other. She falsely accuses myself and other empoyees of making statements or not being willing to help out. She recently told me that one of my backroom employees used a racial slur in the backroom and that I needed to have a conversation with her. I did speak with her and when it was brought up she was nearly in tears as she is a tenured associate and also of a different race and she was mortified that anyone would ever say that she would use the word she was being accused of. However, I had another employee (who knows nothing of whats going on) come to me and state that this manager made a racial comment about the backroom employee and also was making comments about her religion.

She purposely keeps information from me that I need to do my job and twists situations around to fit her sick rules. She criticizes associates who are great assets to our team and makes them feel as though their contributions don't count as well as holding back information on open positions to other associates because she wants to keep her "power house" team at our store. I don't feel it is fair to hold back info on jobs for people who would do great because you are selfish and want to keep them at your store.

Myself and about 5 other employees who are victims of this abuse have banded together and called the proper people to have this situation taken care of. As of yet we are still waiting on results.

I did contact a lawyer to discuss if we would have a case and what our next step would be but because we have no bully law in Wisconsin I feel at a loss as to what to do not only for myself but these employees who are physically getting ill if they have to work with this manager. There are 2 of us from the 5 that are now having to take medication for anxiety and depression and I have the worst insomnia I find it hard to function on a daily basis. I don't really know where else to turn and could really use some advice. As a manager and a mentor I feel that I need to step up to help these employees that are being harmed as well as myself.

Now it's just the waiting game as the investigation for the phone calls that were made can take up to 2 weeks before they have results as to what happened with the complaints. We are all scared of losing our jobs but sticking together as a team which I think will help us in the long run.
Hopefully no retaliation will occur... anyone else dealt with something like this and had positive results??

Comments for Retail Store Manager Needs Advice

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Retail Store Mgr. Needs Advice
by: Anonymous

I am sorry to hear your life has become entangled in such a difficult situation. I find that Dr. Alan Godwin has some good insights for situations like yours in How to Solve Your People Problems -- Dealing with your difficult relationships. His book is helping me a great deal. I am sure there are others out there, too. Just don't give up until you find some satisfactory answers. We can't let bullies ruin our lives.

Its a Crap Shoot
by: Solange

Sorry to use a crass title, but I think that's what complaints at work really are. It depends on the maturity of the people you are complaining to. I left a job a couple of years ago because of some of the "smartest" bullying imaginable. I mean, this woman knew how to exploit others to get what she wanted. I complained and it was all blamed on me.

Get this... the manager accused me of forcing my opinion on others, then refused to give any examples, therefore, he forced his opinion on me that I forced my opinion others. (If you knew me, you'd see the real absurdity of this accusation.) See what I mean about maturity? How can you make a reasonable impression on someone who communicates in such an irrational way?

At my present job, I ran into another snake like the "smart bully" at my other job. This time I complained, and the behavior was stopped in its tracks. The difference was not the bullying. The bullying was exactly and I mean exactly the same stuff I had experienced at the other job. The difference was the manager, who is both kind and fair, who has a clear vision of what appropriate behavior is and is able to communicate it effectively.

I've said in a lot of my posts that the key to ending workplace bullying is education. I still believe that. But I also believe that its important to have compassion for those whose decision making abilities are impaired by their own woundedness. Those people just feel the need to pass their pain on to others and do it through this odd hierarchical trap we call the workplace. You put your trust in someone who represents an organization... we give them the power to wipe their pain on us because we are afraid to lose our livelihoods... and these days that could happen!

I hope that your managers are like the one I work with now. You deserve to have a workplace that is painfree.

very proud of not having with that kind of drama
by: Anonymous

why do you think I would get verbally abusive with store managers and associates who give me a hard time giving me quality customer service???? I once bullied corporate to get a really bad manager who got into a screaming argument with me and its all because of her attitude. One day I found out she doesn't work there anymore. Man did it feel great throwing her under the bus. If theyre bitchy with their staff, chances are theyre bitchy with the customers. Believe my boyfriend and I had to work with that type. I'm still pissed people don't get hired for their people skills anymore and than likely "who they know"

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