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Submitted by: Anton Hout

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Sleep problems, feelings of nervousness and anxiety, tearfulness, inability to concentrate, hypersensitivity and an overwhelming sense of injustice are symptoms of stress and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). I am concerned that this has gone on for so long. Stress is not to be taken lightly. Extreme levels of stress are common in cases of workplace bullying and mobbing. Mobbing (group bullying) has been described by Prof. Kenneth Westhues, as "the stressor to beat all stressors". You need to see your doctor and let him or her know what you are experiencing. Not all doctors are aware of the dynamics of workplace bullying and may attempt to blame you in some way. This is an attribution error but you must persist. If they don't understand bullying and how extreme the levels of stress can be you may have to find another doctor. The same applies to mental health professionals. According to Glynis Sherwood, MEd, CCC, when deciding on a prospective counselor you need to find one that "understands that you are a victim of abuse and does not confuse psychological injury with mental illness. They must be familiar with the emotional and physiological symptoms of bullying and neither minimizes nor misattributes symptoms to other problems." You will likely need to take some time to let yourself heal and find effective and healthy ways of dealing with stress. Have a look at our "Stress Management" and "Health and Wellness" sections for more information. Once you are strong enough you may need to find a better place to work. Workplace bullying is not your fault. Employers that engage in or tolerate bullying do not deserve talented employees. Leave and find a company that respects and values its workers.

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Submitted by: Anonymous

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One of the sorrowful traits of victims is their willingness to be victimized. I can understand that you could be bullied at work, but not that you have allowed the situation to "go on for years". Get out of there ASAP before you lose what's left of your marbles. If there is no other work where you live, move or stay home and grow beans in your backyard.

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Submitted by: Anton Hout

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While I agree that finding a better workplace is a good idea in this case your comment, "One of the sorrowful traits of victims is their willingness to be victimized." perpetuates a myth. Bullies will often justify their behavior by claiming that the target wants, deserves and even likes to be abused. You will note this is similar to what perpetrators of sexual assault claim of their victims as well. Far from being willing victims many targets of workplace bullying try to stand up for what they know is right. The injustice and destructiveness of bullying is obvious and many targets believe that once management is made aware of the problem it will be corrected. Unfortunately, many are unprepared for the surreal response from many companies and HR departments. They dig in their heels and fight. At each stage they are sure the next level of management will see the injustice and costs to the company. This cycle can go on for years. Many times finding alternate work is not an option. For example, targets of workplace bullying or mobbing are often in vertical job markets where there are few other employers in a highly specialized field. The option to "stay home and grow beans in your backyard" is not realistic for most of us. However, considering the damage being done, I agree that exploring other employment options or the possibility of starting her own business would be well advised.

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Submitted by: Anonymous

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I was in a very similar situation - I spoke with my boss about her and I was told that he really really liked her - 1 week later I was fired with no just cause on my letter.

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Submitted by: Lar

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Yes, exactly, I went through the same things, notice I said went. If you are like me, then all you wanted to do, was go to the job you like and do your work, don't bother with the politics, and try to be effective and do meaningful things and if possible, have meaningful relationships with others you work with. Guess again, I thought I must be crazy that I felt the way you described, but when I began to believe in myself again, I realized I had no choice but to resign, as hard as that is to accept, because they win, it is really a hollow victory for them, because you take your integrity with you. The one thing they try to usurp from you. Hang in there and be true to yourself. You are not alone, Good Luck!

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