The Ultimate Understanding Of What A Bully Is
by Lizzy from NJ
What is a BULLY? Plain and simple; A bully is one who uses manipulation and / or intimidation to make another do a wrong or think a wrong idea.
The best example is the schoolyard variety of bully; who will approach the one who is most quiet, cooperative, and good and try to incite this one's anger to begin a fight. The bully knows he's 'safe' because he knows this good one is not going to fight.
Is that odd? You want a fight so you go to the one who won't fight? No, it's not odd. You see, it is true, that a bully type is a coward type. They want to 'talk tough' but they are more fearful than of courage. When the good one doesn't fight... those watching BELIEVE this one is tough. He gathers around him those equally afraid but also not of the good. BULLY LEADER won his mission of having strength in numbers...
A BULLY is someone who entices another to DO OR THINK in a wrong way.
NOW; life is such that sometimes people are called bullies who are not. Those who are strong of convictions and say NO to wrongs; can be accused of being a bully for such good convictions. They get a wrong label put upon themselves.
So... what are the good to do?
1. AVOID and never try to reason with this type of person. Can't be done.
2. Pray 'for them' in private (at home) The good Lord will enlighten your mind as to how to handle the situation or change 'you' rather than this other. You may be led to a new job opportunity, or a chance to move from a neighborhood, or if you must stay and endure how to bring a spiritual good to yourself for it... by 'offering up' this suffering situation for: (name an intention of good) The Lord never gives more cross than we can bear so... in time, God will lead the good OUT of this tough set up. Meanwhile MAKE IT WORK for your spiritual good.
3. Hang with the good. Keep a strong network of support to talk over the day or week's bully ways. OUTSIDE of the office support network. Church friends, sports friends, or one close friend who just listens. Will keep you from coming down to the level the bully wants to bring you down to.
4. Stay in the good way, keep the lips tight, do nothing that will condemn you in the mind of others, BE UPBEAT, helpful, TO ALL. Eat lunch outside of the office lunchroom; MAYBE with another co worker but STAY CLEAR of lunchrooms. The walls hear EVERYTHING... and will twist it. go to lunch at a designated time and come back ON TIME. Do not speak where you go. JUST GO and if you have a desk with your work in it.LOCK IT UP. (some bullies will attempt to sabotage your work) Shut down your computer so no one can access it.
Be ABOVE REPROACH...give them no reason to believe THE BULLY.
Being Bullied at Work?
What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know