Whipping Boy Receptionist

by Desperate
(North Carolina)

I started this job right before the recession. At first I noticed it was my boss yelling at me all the time over the least little things. She pulled me in her office and proceeded to give me a twenty minute lecture about how she preferred staples over paperclips. I might understand it if she had told me first she preferred staples and then if I brought her something with a paperclip gave me a lecture.

This extended to other employees. My boss actually encouraged others to blame me for their mistakes. We have a third party billing company. If our customers use this company they get a discount on billing and this company guarantees payment to us.

I am not allowed to work with this company. (because I'm so, you know, "incompetent") My co-worker had a customer who used this third party billing company. She got an order from a customer, and then got an approval number from this third party billing group. Later that same day the customer calls and cancels the order. This employee is then supposed to call 3rd party group and cancel the approval number and then cancel the order in our computer system. She did neither and I wouldn't be allowed to cancel these orders because, you know, I am so "incompetent". However, at the end of the day it is my job to take all the paperwork back to accounting, this includes voids.

So two weeks later when 3rd party billing group calls to complain, I hear my boss telling the other employee that it must be ME... that I must have thrown the paperwork away and therefore it is all my fault. She wouldn't have even given me the paperwork until she canceled it. The fact that it wasn't canceled in our computer system or with the third party billing group is evidence that SHE didn't do it.

And on and on... I have many stories like these.

My problem is I know that there is no recourse. It's a family owned business and I have tried to talk about my bosses behavior with the owner but it's daddy's little girl and no matter how polite I am about it he always takes offense. I have NO self esteem. I need to leave here I'm scared to death about what kind of reference these people are going to give me. Yes I have a bad attitude now. Every time I hear my name being mentioned I jump on the defense. I try not to socialize with other employees. I try to just keep to myself. I'm paranoid all the time. If I am fortunate enough to leave how do I NOT carry this negativity to my future workplace. Help please.