I've Been a Victim of Spiteful Bullies My Entire Life

by Tiana
(Reading, UK)

I've been a victim of spiteful bullies my ENTIRE life it begun in the first 6 months of life when social workers told my adoptive mother nobody wanted to adopt a ginger baby!

Anyway, cut a long story short, I have been singled out by certain individuals in EVERY workplace I've worked in and now suffer from body dismorphic disorder and anxiety/depression ever since my early years.

My adoptive mother was a critical, nit picking, bitchy, bully always making me feel inferior and unpopular due to my avoidance of people as I don't trust many people and refused to join in her gossip mongering so she singled me out and made my life during the time I lived with her a living hell.

I even started to self-harm in 1997 because of her relentless abuse! It's been much the same in jobs. There was ALWAYS one or more nasty individuals who picked on me and I've ended up having to literally walk out of every job I've had because of it! I have come to the conclusion I'm unemployable and even when the DWP sent me on stupid training courses I was AGAIN bullied and singled out by people there!

It seems to be a pattern and I'm not a nasty person—far from it! But I guess people take kindness as a weakness and see a victim to abuse and humiliate to the point that now I'm fuelled by psychotic anger and as a result of the high levels of cortisol in my body I now suffer from serious health conditions which I feel will inevitably kill me because there's only so much the body can take.

At 47 years old I am now a carer for my neighbour who also can be a bitchy bully especially wen she's had a drink. So again I'm having to tolerate this in order to survive e.g. keep a roof over me and 15-year-old daughters heads! I have skills but not many and there is always someone else who's younger and more skilled than me that beats me to the post!

Guess I'm just one of life's rejects and I've had to accept this now. Yeah it sucks but being a victim is my "place" in life and despite numourous attempts to improve my sad 'n' sorry situation it ALWAYS goes pear shaped. So I've given up! No point in tryin' anymore and before anyone suggests looking for the burff muvva (family) that's already been done she tracked me down in 2002 and all I can say is it was a HUGE mistake for me to go along with it cos she turned out to be one selfish delusional bitch who only had interest in me to suit her selfish needs.

Then as with most people she unceremoniously dumped me then set her other daughters on me! Anyway, so there's that! So, all in all my life has been one big misery one after the other over 'n' over again!