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What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Over Jealous Coworker


(Australia)

To give a background to the situation, both myself and the bully are the same age.

When I started my job, I was chatting with the bully and she was expressing her love for chicken carbonara, I said my mum makes her own spaghetti having grown up in Sicily. She then proceeded to write a letter to my mum saying she will pay my mum $20 to cook chicken carbonara. My mum did cook it and I brought it to work, believing it would help to build my workplace relationship with this person, she refused the food. In hindsight, I can see that the act of writing the letter to my mum was strange behaviour and that it was an indicator for what was to come.

Since then, I have been threatened by her, had nonstop sexualised comments about my "see through tops" and my "bra strap showing" on days with 35 degree celsius heat. Comments about my weight and eating habits, with her telling me to "eat up." I have also had this person tell me (not ask) to complete her shift with a particular client while she went home repeatedly for 4 weeks. When I asked my boss about this, they said they had no idea about it.

I told one staff that I was in a relationship and since then, the bully has been yelling "when are you getting married?" "Can I be a bridesmaid?" "Have you had sex yet?" "Use protection!"

I have written and reported all of these incidents. With my HR representative only changing the days I work, in order to avoid her. However, the bullying has spilled across to other workers and they are now confronting me about rumours she has spread about me.

In the last five weeks, I have not been sleeping longer than 3-4 hours at a time. I am constantly in a heightened state, with nervousness, shaking and nausea. I have only worked a total of 12 hours during this time, with continuous sick days and being driven home sick by my boss halfway through a shift. I dread going to work and want to cry every second I am there. The lack of sleep and stress is affecting my health, as it triggers relapses and loss of cognitive function with my multiple sclerosis.

I love my job but hate putting up with this from my coworkers. I don’t know what else to do. Do I stay with this company or move elsewhere? Please help!

Comments for Over Jealous Coworker

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I understand
by: Anonymous

I certainly feel for you.. I understand COMPLETELY! ..rumours being spread, fear of going to work, I ended up making an attempt on my life in the workplace as no one would help me (they didn’t want to damage the works image) I was scared stiff of the bullies & the feelings I had.
They never called an ambulance when they found me hanging AND made me work straight after ~ I was so scared I did!
However it came to a halt then, I was taken to the Drs after work by family & after a year + of counselling & taking them to court I feel like I have a new life.
It can happen but it’s hard, I wish everyone strength.

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