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Passive/Aggressive Finance Manager Using Bullying Tactics
I feel silly writing about my bullying story and have often wondered 'is it bullying?' Or am I just over reacting...
I work as a finance manager for a division and we deal with another division on an inter company basis.
For whatever reason myself and the Finance Manager of the other division have not really seen eye to eye.
Whilst in the first few months of work we had a pleasant relationship I feel this turned toxic when I began improvement plans within our division and identifying areas for improvement.
Family and friends have suggested he's just jealous because I'm more forward thinking young and a woman so probably just feels threatened.
There has been a long standing culture of 'us and them' so I'm not sure if it's just part of the culture however I have experienced the following behaviour from the finance manager and feel he has a very passive/aggressive nature towards me:
Ignores my emails
Responds to my emails cc me in but replies to my manager
His tone of email is very patronising we have been set joint team tasks by the directors of the company and I get responses such as 'this is beyond your remit', 'I don't think you understand what we have been asked to do'
When I have arranged a meeting with him to go through the team tasks I have had to wait up to 15 minutes rather uncomfortably in his office whilst he finishes something else
He sends me inaccurate information, has requested information from me then changed it and sent it on to others for no justified reason, has sent me information literally 1 minute before a meeting.
We have 360 appraisals in which I know the feedback was from this person where they have completely slated me for my work, performance and personality some of the comments made were completely unfounded and really hurtful saying that I was manipulative and had hidden agendas that it was 'my way or the highway'.
This person however seems to be very influential in the business and the comments made above have been picked up by the directors.
I have explained to our finance director the issues I am having and was surprised by the response I got which I did not find supportive. The directors comments were I needed to build a working relationship with this person and identify weaknesses in my own traits that is stopping this from happening.
No matter how much I try with this person nothing works, I have been friendly towards them despite the above and during certain occasions they are friendly back but then stab me in the back next chance they get.
I've just got back from another day of passive aggression from this person and I am at the point where I feel I need to leave the company because I just can't take it anymore.
Due to the nature of the work I am unable to avoid this person but I'm at the point where I can't stand to be in the same room as them and exchange fake pleasantries.
If anyone can offer any advise on how to deal with this or just some honesty if I'm just making something out of nothing
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