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There Is A Common Sense Answer To Workplace Bullying
by Lizzy from NJ
It's been awhile since I wrote on this site. I have shared many a story of 'my experiences' in the business world and yes... the constant haranguing, taunting, ostracizing and other emotional means that today's society uses to get a person to QUIT or be terminated (bullies don't care how you go out) That constant emotional stuff ... is quite wearing to one's psyche... and confusing when you are not of the same way of being.
Yes... bullies will 'give it' to those who are nice. (too nice to give it back)
1. Never give it back. Do not ever come down to same lever of interacting as 'the bully' / Why? because just as was said on the school playground ... you will hear it said on the workplace 'playground' ... You should have known better. The bully always gets away with his or her nasty ways and management knows who the bully is. The Principal on playground knows who the instigator of the playground fights is. The authority... also knows who is not a bully and expects 'the good' to act different and bring bully 'up a notch or two' in behavior. (which is unrealistic on the part of authority and a 'cop out' on their duty as good authority to ensure the peace and cooperative way. But... authority never the less expects "the good" to not give it back. (so 'never' give it back)
2. To handle workplaces of today... means knowing the reality for yourself. If you are going to a new job after age 40 -- to work full time (if full time exists) You are not in tune to what is. This is a computerized world and a machine automated world. The reality is there is no need for 40 hour a week workers or 30 hour a week workers (unless in some busy factory where a Union protects you from being terminated) This was where I failed to see. In my years of work 40 and 30 hour weeks were still 'norm' by employers... economics were still 'good' and it only benefited employer to have such hours. (get the work out and make money while the money making was good) So... if business is offering 40 hours, I nodded in my 'worker naive mind' (or even 30 hours) but...
In private business (no matter how small a shop) "humble yourself" ... do not take the place of honor at 'table' ... do not try to fit in as once you could when 22.
The 'new workplace' of today's society of 'computerized and automated' will not take in 'new person' with a smile. They are insecure for their jobs. There's little new businesses out and about to apply to...they who are younger (with more bills) will see you 'older' (40 plus) as hindrance not help to them. They will directly or indirectly give a hard time. They will see you as a threat to their livelihood and you set yourself up to being given a hard time. Rather... work two part time jobs... (this was my error, when work and hiring was still abundant... I did not see myself as old, but in the business world, anyone over 40 who is looking for 'a new job' ... will not get the respect and support such age and experience should get. It will not happen .. not if you are administration or just a worker. (it is the human nature ... where money is concerned... to be nasty and insecure.
3. It is best to 'humble yourself' and later be 'exalted' by being ASKED to come on full time. When you work two part time jobs (or one part time job and your own avocation small business of your own, you are taking control for yourself. Don't fight business and their 'ethics' ... Work with what is. As per the Serenity prayer... change what can be changed and accept what can't be ... be wise to know 'difference' / You as worker can't change how a business thinks but you can change how YOU see and think. (work two part time jobs or one part time job and work your own small avocation business) Don't worry about the health benefits thing... say THANK YOU to God for good health and especially good mental health by avoiding the insecure workers in workplaces.
If not advancing in one employer and you are downsized at age 40... put 'pride aside' and humble yourself. (work two part time jobs) Do not worry what others think of you. Don't worry about 'your career' (to be honest, if you could only be 'a worker' ... your 'career' is "to be a worker" .. so work the system as it is... work part time.
All this is hard to think of when one is first terminated 'without real cause' ... "bullied out" yet you know you could have done so much good for that firm. You trusted the one who hired when he or she said 'you were needed.' Don't take words by human literally. They need you... til they do not need you. You are not indispensable and the bottom line is all that matters in business doings.
Know what matters and just work two part time jobs and do not let those in either job KNOW you have two part time jobs. (and you will always have a job, the business world still see's you as a profit to their 'beloved' bottom line. (That is all a business see's... know the truth and do not try to change them)
That's my latest 'aha' moment.