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What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know


by anomounous

It is a long story... but I reluctantly took a job in a very small Unit that I was my area of expertise. I say reluctantly due to the fact that there was an individual there that was well known as what I have become to know as a "Workplace Bully". The string of employees before me lasted all of 6 months to 2 years... in fact they had to offer $10,000 dollar sign on bonuses to get any applicants. So I finally decided that I would take a position as I knew one of the current employees "who was normal" and figured my direct feedback style would reign in any of the bully behaviors (mind you I did not get offered any "sign on" bonus).

Well within 2 months I was in the Manager's office saying I can not work with the individual "the bully" and please post the position and I will stay until it is filled and the person is trained. Well, I was begged to stay and told things would change. After three more attempts to resign and complaints and meeting with HR and the Bully. The situation worsened... my manager became the Target for awhile and eventually was replaced... one of the reasons was that she would not get rid of me (by this time I had decided that I should not be driven out of my "very nice job"... making $120,000 as an RN... a 70% sitting job and I have a medical condition that makes a physically demanding job too difficult).

Well the new manager had a mission to get rid of me and the Bully seemed to know... as the bullying tactics increased 100%... of course I complained to the new manager as I was not aware of the agenda. Well long story short... I was removed from my job after sharing feelings about my experiences during Team Building meetings and labeling my treatment as Lateral Violence... a well known subject in the Nursing literature.

Well I now have an EEOC charge and am still working for my employer but have been BLACKLISTED when attempting to find suitable employement. The Bully is still in place and continues to bully but is somewhat controlled for the time being... there was a traveling employee who was her target for about 8 months... but as the literature shows the Bully always needs a target...

The new target seems to be the Manager or another new employee who has the "I will not be manipulated style" so now that the traveler is gone she is already acting up even going so far as to Bully the new manger... this is a person I knew who worked there and begged me to come on board. It turns out that due to State regulaton the manager needed to have experience in the area of expertise so now my former co-worker is the Manager.

Her hands are being controlled by the old/new manager who is now the Administrator. I could go on about the blacklisting but the whole thing is completly unbelievable and I have suffered greatly. We are now waiting for the EEOC investigation as an attempt at mediation failed. It failed because I wanted a clause that I would be reinstated when the person they claimed to be protecting me from resigned her full time position.

I stood to only recoop the money I borrowed to retain an attorney... and a little more that was all the attorney's that I had to pay taxes on... Mind you I am a nurse with 24 years experience who has rarely even had to apply for a job. This has totally destroyed my life... but I continue to work a "shit job " in the per diem pool and wait for the eeoc investigstion... I am a FIGHTER!

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Bully Practice not Target Practice
by: Solange

Bullies are like little children who are afraid. In the grown-up world, unfortunately, when a bully is in a place that we give them power over us, they can do tremendous harm. IF we take it. We don't have to give in to the drama, but when you are in it, its hard to see how not to. So those of us who are targets, we take it for some reason. Maybe inside we really believe that what they are saying is true, or that we somehow deserve their abuse. Well, nobody deserves abuse for any reason BUT everyone deserves love. Now I would not recommend going up to these people and telling them that you love them. That would be a disaster for you! Love has no boundaries of time or space. You can send love just by imagining that person sitting in front of you and sending love to them. It often helps to imagine them as little, innocent children. They didn't get the love they needed then, so they try to fill the holes with emotional violence as adults. It never works, so they do it over and over again. Like falling into the same hole over and over again, until you learn to go a different way. Try sitting down and sending love. If anything, it will soothe YOUR soul. Most likely, it will soothe their souls, too, at some deeper level we can't even know about. Then watch your situation change.

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