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What Every Target of Workplace Bullying Needs to Know

Elementary School Principal Is A Huge Bully Herself

by Monica
(Los Angeles)

My 6 year old granddaughter is the target of a set of girls bullying. One of the little girls who is bullying my granddaughter the older sister (4th or 5th grader) of a boy in her class. He is a classmate of my granddaughter. Well the older sister is everyday looking for her just to harass her. Her brother also picks on her.

I've informed the after school coach of it, and he did nothing! I've informed the principal and she shocked me!!!
She said my granddaughter is not getting bullied. But now my granddaughter cries, is sad and says she has no friends.

Comments for Elementary School Principal Is A Huge Bully Herself

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Schoolyard Bullying
by: Lizzy NJ

I can understand your distress for your granddaughter. Of course, it your granddaughter of six isn't taught to handle this the correct way, she MIGHT (MIGHT mind you) grow up to be shy and reticent to reach out to others.

So… having felt the taunts of 'the playground' and 'kids' myself; first I ask: how is your granddaughter at home? What is her personality at home? Is she outgoing? friendly, quiet friendly? At six years of age, does she have one special play friend? or is she a loner? Does your granddaughter get pushy at times herself? Take no offense; children can all be somewhat unaware of feelings of others.

Somehow; you need to teach your granddaughter or her mom and dad teach her; how to get along 'generally' with all. And how to ignore those people she doesn't like and that it is ok 'not to be friends' with EVERY PERSON. At six; not having her stay and play after school…might be best. KIDS ARE KIDS and as grandparent or parent…KIDS aren't going to bully in front of another adult, bigger than they are. You, as parents of your grandchild, might show grandchild how to be friendly to unfriendly; have grandchild point out her 'enemies' then after school; you approach them; not school principle. Talk TO them in nice way as though 'all is normal' (remember they are kids) Ask them if they would come to a play day at grandchild's home (invite a few other friends as well) In this way, you the adult see first hand 'personalities' and then you can teach your granddaughter in private, how to 'get along with' other personalities different than herself. (teach on her level of understanding) Don't necessarily take the word of your six year
old…view first hand (but don't tell granddaughter all this)

Principal isn't going to get involved. (like business management doesn't get involved) Teach your child to handle people herself, and not 'run for protective authority' / she learns; by watching your actions (or her parents actions)

You are the 'adult' who has to determine the truth your grand-daughter states. Do it on friendly terms; invite the enemy to grandchild's home for private play. Then; if these two are 'bad influence' or seem 'not suitable' / discuss it with parents of bully children. OR INVITE the bully parents as well as children to a party. (parents talk to parents and get to know each other as children get to know each other)

When parents know one another and get along…the bully kids won't have 'an ally' of their parents. (remember; bully kids might be saying something to their parents as well) When children see the one they pick on lives 'as they' and like same toys, games to play and food to eat…they as kids in kid way form a bond.

Handle this with a mature adult handling …graciously; FIRST. Don't 'tattle' to the principal…or playground supervisor. YOU WILL BE teaching your small child a big lesson on how to make a friend and not an enemy.

Unfortunately things may not change
by: Anonymous

Sorry to hear that. It was our experience that when the school is dysfunctional when it comes to bullying that it will not get better. I posted this story last year.

Our daughter used to attend high school in the south part of Torrance, CA and had to switch schools mid semester because of bullying. The school only made the problem worse. There are a LOT of details, but I will only put some highlights here. Our daughter was bullied online through a social media site for months. We had made copies of all the threats and delivered them to the school principal. The threats were very specific and we told him that this other girl was planning to hit our daughter. They both played on the varsity soccer team. The only action they took was to bring them both in for a 5 minute meeting, then let it go at that.

Then a week later, the other girl attacked her. The girl went up behind her during lunch in the main lunch area, grabbed her hair, and pulled her head to the ground so hard that she lost consciousness briefly and we later learned had a concussion. Even though she had a head injury, among other things, the school didn't even call an ambulance, rather just had her sit in the nurses office.

Two days later, the soccer coach actually took a player and team parent vote on who he should kick off the team, basically making it a popularity contest, and kicked our daughter off even after he was told that our daughter would not be kicked off (she was found to have no guilt in the incident). The bully was eventually kicked off and at the end of the year, the coach was told to not let her attend the year-end banquet. When she showed up, he let her attend and also sit right across from our daughter, which made her so upset she had to leave.

We raised these issues with the School District Superintendent and Board of Education, who ruled after their formal process was complete that the school had done nothing wrong. And that was pretty much it... they don't have a governing body to answer to. Throughout this ordeal, the principal also refused to speak with us or return phone calls several times.

We have since met other people who had bullying experiences at this school that were not addressed. Other schools have mentioned the coach should have definitely been fired just for taking a team vote, yet at this school there are no consequences for anyone.

We sold our house this year just for the sake of moving and not having to have our younger son in the Torrance School system. At this school, it was made very clear that they would never admit to any wrongdoing, or that our daughter was ever in danger, because they then could be held liable for what happened.

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